Olivia's World

I've held my tongue for ever when it comes to my family, I mean, I dont really say anything.
Some times, I dont even feel like we're a family, I mean.. I cant really remember the last time we were all in the same room for longer than 30 minutes.

Its sad to see what's happened, you know.. I dont really complain, because I get to see them. Especially my dad, I love him so much, but growing up I really didn't see that much of him, because of his work schedule, when I got up for school he was asleep, and when I came home, I would miss him by 30 mins to an hr, because he had to go to work, and whenever the weekend came, he rarely spent time at home.

I'm grown now, but... I've gotten to the point where I'm looking back at my life, and you know like "what the hell?", I cant really stand being in the room alone with my dad.. nothing personal, or if he's at home, I'd rather him be here, but no in the same room with me, just be around, i know its weird, and when somethings wrong I'd rather go to my mom, before my dad and I absolutely HATE ask him for anything, I just feel like, I dont really need him, he breaks promises. he will say anything to make you feel better and run from the truth and I cant stand to even, look at him sometimes.

hell, he came to my high school graduation, and after we threw our hats up, I went to the stands and he wasn't there, my mom said his head was hurting so he left, but, I felt like he could have gave me, 10-15 mins of his time, it was my day, it hurt my feelings, but I didn't speak on it.

I somewhat, remember the fun times, but there weren't too many, and I just dont want that to happen to my kids, if I ever have any.

my real question is "when will men, stand up and be a true father, a real father to there kids?"